Tell Us About 09.2023: Legacy

 

 

On pondering this month’s prompt I remembered one of the most touching things I was told just after Mom died in 08.2022 was that my brother, sister, and I are her legacy.  My sweetheart (former) sister-in-law Metra reminded my brother, sister, and I that we were Mom’s legacies now.  And that thought was such a comfort to me.  I felt like Mom (and Dad) had gifted us with so much in her 95 years and now it was up to us to carry on for her.  A big job!!

My parents were wonderful savers and planners.  Years before my father retired, they investigated estate planning and set up a family trust.  Every time I visited them after that, I was reminded that the original trust was in the safe deposit box, that copies were in the hall closet filing cabinet and that keys to the safe deposit box were under the lavatory in their bathroom.  When Mom died, everything was in such good order and yet we still ran into some snags as we took care of finalizing their accounts and splitting the trust.  But they did so well and thought of practically everything.  The regulations and restrictions around financial planning change with the wind so it would be impossible to prepare for every potential change.

Our Turn

 

When I returned home after Mom’s death, I pulled out a planner I had purchased a during Covid,  I’m Dead, Now What?: Important Information About My Belongings, Business Affairs, and Wishes and began filling it in.  It is a great way to start planning and communicating your plans and wishes to others.  We also made an appointment to update our wills, powers of attorney – general and medical; and our living wills.  It was something PC really didn’t relish doing – and who does?? – but necessary.  And surprisingly, not that costly.  

Taking care of this unpleasant business was a legacy left by my parents.  But not the only or most important legacy they left that I hope to pass on.

My Legacy

 

Celebrating my 65th (Medicare) birthday this past April and having lost both of my parents now, has given me pause to reflect on what legacy I hope to leave to my loved ones.  It certainly won’t come in the form of wealth.  I just hope to get out of here without owing anyone anything!!

Have spent some time asking myself what I hope Paul, my daughters, my grandchildren and friends might take away from my life.  Here is a list of things for which I would hope to be remembered:

Love

• Loving them.  Loving them big fast, from one mountain to the other one mountain as Lauren liked to say when she was little.  Here in El Paso, there are mountains as far as you can see in all directions.  So, she couldn’t imagine a love any greater than one that would stretch as far as her eyes could see.  I hope I filled my family with love.

It matters not who you love, where you love, why you love, when you love or how you love, it matters only that you love

~ John Lennon

Uplifting Others

• Making people feel good.  Would like to think that I made those I cared about feel good. And the same for those across whose path I came in the most insignificant ways.  My family, friends, students, their parents…I hope I left them feeling better, feeling cared for and valued.  Sometimes I say some hurtful things and then just want to slap myself.  In my experience, it’s true that we can be the most callous toward those closest to us.  But overall, I hope I have made my special people feel good.

I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.

~ Maya Angelou

Personal Best

• Doing my best.  One of the things I grumble most loudly and frequently about these days is that no one does their job right.  My parents did everything to the best of their ability and raised the 3 of us ‘kids’ to do the same. My daughters do their best and I have every confidence my grandchildren are learning to do what it takes to meet and exceed expectations.

I do the very best I know, the very best I can, and I mean to keep on doing so until the end.

 ~ Abraham Lincoln

Elbow Grease

• Working hard.  I have been called a lot of things but lazy isn’t one of them.  I have tried to impart the importance of hard work to my children and their children.

Nothing ever comes to one, that is worth having, except as a result of hard work.

~Booker T. Washington

Passion

• Living a life I loved.  LIFE has knocked me down more than once but I have always managed to get back up again.  I may not have loved every minute of my life but I think, when all is said and done, I will have lived a life I loved.  I was fortunate enough to have fallen backwards into a job that provided me with a career that I was passionate about for over 25 years.  My life has been enriched by hobbies, exercise, activities and an interest in trying new things.  May my children and theirs be equally blessed.

For what it’s worth; It’s never too late to be whoever you want to be. I hope you live a life you’re proud of, and if you find that you’re not, I hope you have the strength to start over.

 ~ F. Scott Fitzgerald

Bless the Beasts

• Embracing animals and Mother Nature.  I was never around animals as a child so didn’t discover my love for them until I was presented with a newborn kitty by family in the interior of Panama.  From that day over 40 years ago, animals have been an important part of my life.  And they have given me so much joy.  I have been blessed to have been loved by so many pups and kitties.  And Mother Nature…I fall in love with her beauty over and over and over again.  Would hope that those I love will love animals and nature’s wonders as I have.

Until one has loved an animal, a part of one’s soul remains unawakened.

~ Anatole France

Never Along

• Seeking a relationship with God.  And knowing that even on our darkest days, we are never alone.

When Jesus spoke again to the people, he said, “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness but will have the light of life.

~ John 8:12

 

In addition to all of the above, I would hope that I have encouraged creativity, a sense of adventure and a curiosity about new things in those who have come to know me best.  I like to laugh and love to have fun.  And can be pretty goofy and silly or PUNCHY, as my college roommate Ann Abrahamson liked to call it.  I think we all need a bit of goofy fun in our lives.

Big Legacies

 

In preparing for this post, I thought on the women, even girls in some cases, who have left lasting legacies to the world without ever intending to.

• Malala who has fought for girls’ rights to an education
• Helen Keller, an advocate for the underdog and people with vision loss
• American abolitionist Harriet Tubman
• Pocahontas who served to bring together 2 peoples, 2 cultues
• Sadako, icon for world peace
• Anne Frank, my favorite, documented her life in hiding during Nazi occupation

Often our legacy doesn’t become apparent until after we are gone.

Posts from My Pals

 

Here are the links and summaries to this month’s Tell Us About posts shared by my creative friends.  Hope you will stop by to visit them.  And if you have a legacy-themed post to share, please link-up with us from Gail’s blog.

• Marsha who blogs at Marsha in the Middle is sharing the legacy of a truly extraordinary man.  His legacy is in the thousands of children and adults who were fortunate enough to have known him.
• Deb at Deb’s World embraces the quirkiness of life in her response to the question of her legacy, thanks to some helpful technologies.
• Gail at Is This Mutton says Kathleen Lovis was an ordinary woman who never owned a house or car. She didn’t go abroad until she was 81. Kathleen started working at 14. She was the grandmother of Gail from Is This Mutton, who treasures Kathleen’s legacy of a handwritten memoir and recipe book.

And…

• The Frugal Shopper, Penny, felt rather at a loss when contemplating ‘Legacy’ as she had decided to leave this planet with the least fuss possible. And yet she has things to say about ‘Legacy’ which will become clearer when you read her post!  However, Penny is on holiday this week and will post her piece shortly, so no link today!
• Sue at Women Living Well After 50, ponders the question ‘What will my legacy be?’ Legacy is one of those subjects she has never really taken time to ponder or confront.  As she delved to find her answer, she discovered she really does know who she is and embraces and celebrates her unique qualities.
• Suzy at The Grey Brunette’s explores her aspiration to leave a lasting legacy of creativity, inspiration, and empowerment, emphasizing the importance of igniting creativity within oneself and others.