Once Upon a Time & Happily Ever After

Rediscovering Life after Retirement

Stepping Outside My Comfort Zone, 03.2018

Stepping Outside My Comfort Zone, 03.2018

Sweet friends,

Excited to share a new series with you today, “Stepping Outside My Comfort Zone”.  Have been thinking on this idea for about a month as my 60th birthday approaches.  My vision for this series is to push myself out of my comfort zone so that I begin doing things that I have until now been scared or uncomfortable to try.  Nothing illegal – ha – or too crazy!  Probably won’t be sky diving, but maybe scuba diving?  Have no interest in the former but would love to try the latter.  I want to try barre classes.  This winter I want to learn to make tamales.  Learning to master Sudoku.  Those are the kinds of things I am thinking.  Nothing to wild and crazy.

For the most part, I have played things fairly ‘safe’ over the last six decades.  That is, with the exception of throwing all caution and common sense to the wind with some of my previous marriages.  My mom was just saying today that whenever our family would go somewhere when we were children, my sister, brother and I would all stand right beside her, holding onto the hem of her dress.  We were that shy.  And that sheltered.

So, I figure now’s the time to shake things up a bit.

Stepping Outside My Comfort Zone

Recently came across a couple of articles about the benefit of doing something that scares you every day.  Sounded a little sadistic to me at first.  But when I read more, it began to make sense.

Eleanor Roosevelt once said,

You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, ‘I lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.’ [source]

For years, when I was faced with the possibility of doing something difficult, or unfamiliar, I would bolster myself by remembering I had two babies through natural childbirth.  Without any anesthesia what-so-ever.  And if I could do that and live to brag about it, I could do anything.  But doing something that scares you seems contradictory to our body and mind’s natural inclination to keep us from potential harm.

Remember the old adage ‘practice makes perfect’?  Well, it can be applied to our fears.

Stepping Outside My Comfort Zone, 03.2018

Facing and Overcoming Our Fears

According to an article on Help Scout by Emily Triplett Lentz entitled “The Value of Doing Things That Scare You,” the best way to eliminate fear is to expose yourself to those things you are afraid of.  I am not really interested in doing things that scare me as much as I am interested in doing things that push me beyond my comfort zone.  Help me to grow.  Help me to let go of the hem of my mother’s dress.

And the benefits of stepping out of your comfort zone are many.  Some of them are listed in this Life Hacker article, “The Science of Breaking Out of Your Comfort Zone (and Why You Should)” by Alan Henry.  Stepping outside of your comfort zone:

  • leads to improved productivity
  • makes handling unexpected change and new experiences easier
  • it’s causes a domino effect, where it becomes easier to push yourself in the future
  • strengthens brainstorming abilities for finding solutions to life’s challenges
  • enhances creativity
  • enriches life and broadens your horizons
  • feeds your brain
How to Step Outside Your Comfort Zone

Start with baby steps.

I am not thinking of repelling down the Franklin Mountain side tomorrow morning.  But I might take a new route to the airport for my trip to Houston.  Allowing time in case I get lost or stuck in traffic, of course.

Next time I go grocery shopping, I might start on the opposite side of the store.  Eww, really don’t like that idea, but it would be good for me.  And if I have a list to follow, I won’t leave til I have everything on my list.  And I’ll pack a snack in case I’m in there for hours!

Instead of planning weekend activities with PC, maybe we will just get up on Saturday and see where the day takes us.  Make a few snap decisions.  Act on impulse.  Visiting new places, even a new restaurant or cultural event, is one of the best ways to broaden your perspectives.

Maybe baby steps will be all I ever take but at least I will be moving forward rather than staying put in a mire of the familiar.

Getting Started

So, you know PC is still working in Germany.  Well, I decided to step out of my comfort zone this past week by doing some things alone.

I drove the 250 miles each way to and home from Albuquerque with my kitties in the car.  Snapped this photo just as I realized Purrsnickitty was using her bed as a litter box.

Stepping Outside My Comfort Zone, 03.2018

I attended the March for Our Lives on Saturday.

Stepping Outside My Comfort Zone, 03.2018

Went to see the movie “Love, Simon” alone, the subject matter was a little uncomfortable for me.  But it made me think.  Always a good thing.

Stepping Outside My Comfort Zone, 03.2018

And I attended the Femme Frontera film festival at the University of Texas, El Paso, all by my lonesome.  It looks like I was the only one in the audience but I wasn’t.  Just got there early which was completely out of my comfort zone in itself.

Stepping Outside My Comfort Zone, 03.2018

Not the best photos in the world (understatement) but I just snapped them to document these activities.  Thinking plastic surgery on that neck might be something I could investigate…definitely out of my comfort zone but definitely needed.  Thanks, cervical surgeries.

Pretty sure all of this was prompted by the fear/promise of my upcoming birthday.  And the fact that I am not working right now/possibly any more.  I need to fill my time with things that will continue to help me grow and stay young at heart.

Your Turn

A few of my bestest blogging buds are joining me on this journey.  One of them, Natalie from Natalie the Explorer, wrote a similar post, recently.  It’s a great read.  Check it out, here.  We would love to have you come along, too.  If you blog, please link-up an post about how you are stepping out of your comfort zone.

And if you aren’t a blogger, you can share your new experiences in a comment below.  This is going to be good for us, girls.  Hope you will join us again on 04.30 when we will share our progress.

Thank you, sweet friends, for cheering me on and walking by my side for this journey called life.

Hugs and kisses,

leslie

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Comments

  1. Hey, don’t worry about that ‘big’ birthday – remember, you’ll always be younger than me (just!).
    I like this idea, especially now I have a date to leave work – FOREVER eek! There have been a few films I haven’t been to see because Paul wasn’t interested in going to see them, so maybe I should start there – a solo trip to see a film! I also have the most awful sense of direction and shy away from going somewhere new on my own so maybe that would be another option for me. Didn’t realise I was such a scaredy cat until I started to think about it!

    Reply

    • Hey, sweets, thank you! Have been out of town for a week and out of the loop so late replying to comments.

      That big bday is here. And I feel about like I did when I went to bed last night. Thank you for the reminder that you and I are birthday buddies and in this thing together.

      Oh, hope you will write up a post for outside your comfort zone this month. You are already taking great strides toward stepping out or pushing that envelope. It is interesting that we have similar ‘fears’. Let’s hold hands and try some new activities.

      Reply

  2. The biggest fear I’ve had was one that most people have…public speaking.

    While our kiddos were in school, we found ourselves in a volunteer spot where it was part of the deal. To make things worse, it always seemed like Mr. (who actually kind of likes doing talks bc he had to do it for his job) kept nudging me to “take this one” or “do that one”. By the time our term had ended, I really enjoyed composing them and actually (can’t believe I use this word) found them “fun”. ME! The one who wanted to quit a job because occasionally I had to give tours to small groups. Liked. giving. the. talks.

    What I hadn’t realized was that Mr. had been prodding me into giving more of them so I would get over my fears. I did…and I got better at it as I went along. Surprise surprise!

    Now…he hasn’t gotten me over my fear of cooking…haha.

    PS…I ALSO hate my neck (and not a big fan of my droopy eyes, either) and play sudoku on my phone all the time.

    I will enjoy reading your series 🙂

    Reply

    • That mister of yours is a sneaky one. How terrific that he gently nudged you into public speaking until you began enjoying it. That’s what I think I hope to find with most of the activities I want to try. That once I get past the fear, I will enjoy whatever it is and feel proud for having done it. So glad that all turned around for you. What a great comment, thank you.

      Oh, help me with this sudoku thing. I will write you later, when I get home from the library conference. My daughter has explained twice and I think I get it, even tried on the plane to the conference, only to discover I didn’t have it figured out at all.

      Always so warmed by your notes. Big hugs, love.

      Reply

  3. I’ve never heard of that movie “simon”. I like this idea. Traveling scares me and I have so much anxiety leading up to a trip; but once I reach my destination I can relax and enjoy myself.

    Reply

    • Thank you so much, lady bug! Have been at a conference for a week and away from my regular blog-reading and commenting schedule so late replying to comments.

      Traveling by plane scares you or all traveling? I do worry about arriving safely when I travel by air. And about seeing my suitcase again. But I like to travel. Still away from home now for this conference but will fly home on Sunday.

      The movie Love, Simon and it’s premise was not really my cup of tea but I am trying to be more compassionate so wanted to see it. Hoping to continue to expand my life by trying new things.

      Reply

  4. It’s incredibly brave Leslie. Well done for your achievements so far. Stepping out of the comfort zone takes real courage. You’ll always be youthful because you’ll never be set in your ways. X

    Reply

  5. Bravos, Leslie, for starting a new series, and your achievements so far. Thank you again for the shout out. I look forward to reading your progress update.

    Reply

  6. Love the concept Leslie and good for you in acting on your idea. Just so you know turning 60 was wonderful for me and it will be a new chapter for you. I will be joining but not until 30 April. please link this up to next weeks Midlife Share the Love Party you might get some more interest. Good luck with April.

    Reply

  8. That’s so inspirational – I’m a big fan of comfort zones – they’re warm, safe and easy…… the problem is that you can sit in one and stagnate. It made me smile about the starting at the opposite end of the supermarket idea – even that rattles my cage! I’ll be following along with your adventures as you go Leslie and applauding you all the way!

    Reply

    • Thank you, Leanne, for you support. Comfort zones are safe and warm, but mold and bacteria love to grow in warm, safe places. I want to brush the mold off my too comfortable life!!! I like that idiom that moss doesn’t grow on a rolling stone. I need to add some roll to my life!

      Reply

      • Hi Leslie – just wanted you to know that you’ve been inspiring me and I’ve already come up with a couple of things I want to try once I finally get through the AtoZ Challenge – I’ll probably blog about them down the track. I’m aiming for one new thing a month maybe!
        Thanks for linking up with us at #MLSTL and I’ve shared this on my SM xx

        Reply

        • Thank you so much, Leanne. I am aiming for one ‘scary’ thing outside my comfort zone a week. But what scares me might be old hat to most everyone else. Like setting up my Roku yesterday. My daughters wouldn’t bat an eye at doing that. But for me it was definitely outside of my areas of expertise!! Looking forward to reading about your adventures. Thank you for sharing my post and for your sweet support.

          Reply

  9. Hi Leslie,
    Looking forward to hearing about everyone’s “out of the comfort zone exploration” in your link up. I’m not sure if I’ll join in… but you need know. I’ve been doing some of these for the past 2 years (just realized it as I read your blog), so I might have a blog or 2 in me! As a recent retiree, there have been many things I’ve needed to learn how to do, which puts me outside the comfort zone. I need to remember that and keep going.

    Reply

  10. I love this! I’ve definitely tried to step out of my comfort zone more in the past few years. One of those was joining a dance class – I’d never done dance, not even as a child – so it was a big deal for me, and to go alone! I loved it, though I had to quit for a bit, but I’m back (since this past September) and I’ll be doing a recital this June with my groups for tap and hip hop. 🙂 Sometimes these experiences lead to great things!

    -Lauren

    Reply

    • I am so proud of you to be dancing! Yay for YOU!! Can’t wait to see photos and hear about your recital. How very exciting. I did ballet off and on in my youth and would like to try barre classes now. Understand they are quite the workout, though, so one shot at it may be all I am up for!

      Reply

  11. Thanks for this post that has made me think of how I tend to be set in my ways a bit lately. I’m keen to join the challenge. To celebrate turning 60 I walked the Camino de Santiago in Spain. 1000k hiking alone in a foreign country was definitely out of my comfort zone. But I haven’t done much since.

    Reply

    • Come on down!!! Please join us for this series. You have done some amazing things, but sometimes the most amazing can be the smallest, seemingly insignificant activity because it can resonate with others who are afraid to try something new. Thank you for the comment! Hope to see you on 04.30 for our next post.

      Reply

  12. Hi Leslie, I really enjoyed your first post here and stepping outside your comfort zone. I know I signed up to join in but I’m still thinking of what I want to do. I’ve got a few ideas in regards to my blog so I might start on those. I’m starting to push my body again after a series of aches and pains and my walking now includes running patches so that’s been good for me. I’ll keep you posted -thanks for the inspiration and all the best to you!

    Reply

    • Hey, you!! Share your new ideas in regards to your blog. I am wanting to do a few things to my blog, too, but that can be scary and definitely out of my comfort zone. Blog work could be a series all its own! Join us whenever you are ready. XO

      Reply

  14. Good for you!! It’s hard to step out of comfort zones! I am living in a new country, where I do not speak the language very well(yet, I am working on it). So, I totally understand. Even going to a new store is a major undertaking for me living here.

    Reply

    • Hey, Cherie!! My husband has been working in Germany, off and on, for about six months. He was stationed there in the Army years ago but being there now is a different experience. I joined him in October for a week and loved our travels. But I was also glad to come home. As a military wife long ago, I lived in Panama for six years where I didn’t speak the language very well. I can relate to trying to shop in a country where communication is limited. Would love to hear more about your adventures so going to follow you on Bloglovin.

      Reply

  15. Hi Leslie,
    From reading the comments, it looks like you’ve had your birthday (happy 60th!) and are well into your month of baby stepping outside your comfort zone. Baby stepping is a great way to make changes, one of the best. Even if you never do anything more than that, you’re golden.
    I’d like to present an alternative, if I may, to the plastic surgery and the concerns about your neck. Here’s a link to the post I wrote about that very thing -https://profoundjourney.com/true-face-ladder-of-years-a-z-challenge/ . Maybe NOT doing anything is the move outside your comfort zone that is being called for here?

    Reply

    • Oh, Karen, how wise you are. Sometimes doing nothing is a big step outside my comfort zone. I am so used to trying to fix everything, make things all better. Thank you for sharing this clarity. Going to read your article now.

      Reply

  16. I definitely need to step out of my comfort zone. I like the idea of taking baby steps and had never thought about small things like starting on the other side of the store.

    Reply

    • Please let me know if you are interested in joining us for this post on 04.30 or any of the future Outside my Comfort Zone posts on the last day of each month. I am certainly not jumping out of planes over here! Just setting up my Roku, going to the movies alone, making some decisions and acting on them. Even completing our taxes!! Ha! I send out reminders each month with the link-up codes. If you would like to join the email group – no pressure – please give me a holler at mommyhon333@hotmail.com. Thank you for coming by.

      Reply

  17. I loved your blog post and all the adventurous activities you attempted. Couldn’t stop giggling at the cat using her bed as a litter box. I want to join this blog hop and am trying to think how I stepped out of my comfort zone in April. I think it was the A to Z challenge. I may write about that.

    Reply

    • Hey sweets!! Thank you for stopping by. We would love to have you join us for Stepping Outside My Comfort Zone. The posts go live on the last day of the month and April’s post was just our second one! Writing for the A-Z Challenge would completing qualify as something to share…what a daunting task and monumental accomplishment! But you know what, anything out of your normal routine. Truly, anything!!

      If you would like to be added to our email group for reminders and link-up codes, please let me know. My email address is mommyhon333@hotmail.com.

      So glad my silly post gave you a giggle.

      Reply

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